The "F" Word
For the last past two weeks I’ve been really contemplating about what I should post about next and I’ve been so stuck. My mind has been blank lately and it’s because I have allowed negativity to cloud my membrane. It’s true what they say; “Be very careful of who you let pour into your life to give you advice cause it can poison you”. With that being said, let us focus on this very sensitive word, my favorite ‘F’ word; FRIENDS
One thing I can say about me is that I am very outspoken. I love to joke around, make people laugh and just have a good time. I’m that way with everyone whether we are close or not. I can make my enemy feel like we’re BFF’s without giving them my heart (It’s a gift and a curse). But I am very careful about who I call my friend. Ask yourself, what exactly is a friend? Well according to the dictionary;
- a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.
- a person who gives assistance; supporter; patron.
- a person who is on good terms with another; a person who is not hostile
All that is true, but I feel as if a friend is more than that. You’re my friend if you can love me in my moments of being difficult, annoying, troubling, hard headed, and everything that may not be perfect about me. You’re only my friend if people don’t feel comfortable talking to you about me because they know you’ll always have my back whether I was wrong or right. You can only call me your friend if you can come to me and give me true and genuine advice without holding back, being completely honest and being completely comfortable in telling me I was way out of line when I get out of character. Love me for who I am and not try and change me. Encourage me, listen whenever I want to talk your ear off, defend me, let me cry and be angry. Don’t judge me, I’m human and there are times where I can sound like a filthy sailor when I get really mad.
I’m so tired of people acting as if they’re my friends just to get information out of me, people telling me to be careful but not telling me what to watch out for because they don’t want to be a snitch. It makes me giggle when girls will ask questions just to find out if I’ve been hanging with their ex boyfriends or try to find out who I’m dating. You’re not my friend. When is my birthday? What is my favorite color? What do I like to eat? What makes me happy? How many siblings do I have? – Listen carefully, I owe my loyalty to no one except to those I am loyal to. Working together, serving, laughing, joking around, going out to eat does not make us friends, it makes us people who know one another. This post may rub some people the wrong way but lately I have been really silent about how I feel and I have allowed people to do as they please, but in the words of Beyonce “being polite to other people's opinions, isn’t being fair to myself”.
I’m not a mean person, I promise! I’m actually really nice, but I believe in guarding my heart. We can chill hangout, laugh and have a good time together but that is not me giving you permission to creep your way in my personal life. If you don’t know where I work, who I’m dating, who I hang out with its only because I want it like that.
So in conclusion to all this, I want everyone to know that it is not okay for you to do what you please in other people’s lives. Its either you’re a friend or you’re not. Those who my loyalty lies with know exactly who they are, so if you’re not sure then maybe we aren’t friends after all
Psalm 101: 6 - I will search for faithful people to be my companions